haley wrote:

..."I've been in a lot of thought and a little conversation today with someone about this injury. I think I may be onto something with it being related to some kind of suppressed issue or release process needed. Hold that in your thoughts and prayers. If it is the issue, I am asking for it to arise, resolve and fall away quickly."...

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Haley,

I'm against the clock to finish my set of audio clips to share with our Group tomorrow, before Thursday's ABC News report on UFOs, but I could not pass up relating the following personal experience, which will shed light on what you said above.

Back in 1984 I took part as an assistant in a very intense and physical week long personal growth program known as "The 6 Day Course". that took place in the hills/mountains of NY State, which was created by Werner Erhard, the originator of the famous "Est Training", which later became "The Forum".

I was selected to the most coveted assisting position as group leader for about a dozen participants. That day they were going to take part on one of the most physically challenging and feat confronting processes that one can imagine.

In order to remain qualified as an assistant, we too, had to go through extensive training and disciplines ouerselves, specially being on time to meetings.

The night before the event assistants had a critical meeting (which we had to be on time for), and as I got to my chair with about 2 minutes to spare, I realized I had left my manual at the kitchen supply room in the building's basement, which had about 20-25 very narrow steps to go down.

I rushed out of the meeting room to get the manual in order to get back in time (I didn't want to jeopardize this coveted opportunity for anything!) and as I got to about 2/3 down the steps I had a missed step and flew down the rest of the way landing with great force directly on my tail bone.

The pain was excruciating, but I composed myself enough to get the manual, run back up the stairs and be back on my chair with but a few seconds to spare.

THE NEXT MORNING! I could not even get out of my upper bunker for the pain was horrendous, and I had great difficulty even straighting up. I did not want to miss my coveted opportunity, so I endured.

Afterwords, as we sat in the main room in preparation for the day long event, the staff leader was pointing out the importance of keeping our integrity in all aspects of this participation. He kept asking if there were any witheld communications, for people's lives were at stake in these physically and fear confronting events we were to take part - and which assistants, as myself, had to also execute.

I could have sworn he was looking directly at me - although he probably had no way of knowing what had happened to me. I started to turn pale, nauseous, and began to have cold sweats. As much as I wanted to take part in the assisting, I stumbled to the staff leader at the end of the meeting, to disclosed what I was going through. Now, you got to keep in mind that there was no other assistant trained to take my place.

The staff member asked me to see him at his office, as the rest of the people were moving on to start that day's events. As I sat across his desk he asked me,"What is going on with you?" I related the whole episode that happened to me and about the physical condition I was in.

Again, he asked me "What is going on with you?. I didn't know what he missed so I started relating the whole thing again. He stopped me and again asked me a 3rd time: "What is going on with you?" I kept saying that I din't know what else and he kept repeating the same question. I finally said I don't know what else was going on with me to which he replied "Take a look to see what is really going on with you.

I paused for a few seconds, took a very hard and honest look to what was going on with me - what I had not been willing to confront about me - and I started to cry (I'm chocked up right now recalling the experience, just writing about it).

The thing I got to see about myself is that I'm afraid of responsibility and "create" circumstances to "wiggle" out of them - and worst, I never communicated this to anyone - including myself!

This was further compounded when I heard in the morning's briefing that people's lives were at stake. That's when my physical manifestations of nausea and cold seats really took hold.

Now, a seeming "magical" thing transpired after I communicated this. All the physical end emotional issues seemed to slowly subside!..I SWEAR. We talked some more (amidst my tears), and he finally asked me if I was now ready to do my job. I said yes.

That day the group that I led was OUTRAGEOUS! We went 100%, 100% of the time. I felt a sensitivity in my tail bone area but that was all. Something out of the ordinary seemed to have taken a grip on us as reflected how outrageous my group was.

At the end of the day, as we were heading back to the main camp I saw the staff member walking quickly towards me with a very stern face, as though he was angry!.

All I could think was "Oh shit!"

He got right up to my face and with that same stern look on his face he told me " YOU GUYS WERE AMAZING!"

Later on, in the early evening, as people started to share about their amazing experiences and how fear has kept many from expressing themselves and being fully out there in the world, the staff member used my experience as an illustration about how literally "miracles" could happen in our lives, if we are authentic, specially to ourselves, and how by acknowledging our fears, fears will not tend to stop us.

Later on, our group was acknowledged for being the best that day. We came to the front and ALL of us were in tears (as I am right now!)

So darling, what do you need to communicate? What are you withholding? What fears are you not willing to confront that may be manifesting with your back and other physical ailments? Go on RIGHT NOW, take a look AND communicate it!

Let me know!

In love,

Jack

Jack

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/FORUM_FOR_DISCLOSURES/

"The REVISED EFFECT Network" Blog http://effectnetwork.blogspot.com/

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