THE SUBSIDIARY OF KOCH INDUSTRIES FORMERLY KNOWN AS WISCONSIN
Charles Pierce, ESquire
hings are livening up in the subsidiary of Koch Industries formerly known as the state of Wisconsin. Recently, a federal judge threw out the state law banning marriage equality. Some county clerks, bless 'em, started handing out marriage licenses to same-sex couples. Not so fast, said Attorney General J.B. Van Hollen, an ally of Scott Walker, the goggle-eyed homunculus hired by Koch Industries to manage this particular subsidiary. Not only is he telling the clerks to cease and desist in their complicity with equality, but he's also threatening to throw them in the sneezer if they don't continue to practice the previously established public bigotry. OK, I'm paraphrasing a little.
Van Hollen, a Republican, told the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel newspaper that gay couples who have married since U.S. District Judge Barbara Crabb issued her ruling last week aren't legally married and district attorneys could opt to charge county clerks who issued them licenses with a crime. "That's going to be up to district attorneys, not me," Van Hollen said. "There are penalties within our marriage code, within our statutes, and hopefully they're acting with full awareness of what's contained therein. ... You do have many people in Wisconsin basically taking the law into their own hands, and there can be legal repercussions for that."
Abiding by the decision of a federal judge is now "taking the law into your own hands"? This is new legal territory here.
Dane County, the most liberal county in the state, began issuing licenses within hours of Crabb's June 6 decision. Clerk Scott McDonell called Van Hollen's warning that prosecutors could charge clerks "ridiculous." "There has to be (criminal) intent. If a reasonable person can read that the judge clearly invalidated the state ban on same-sex marriage, what would be the charge?" he said.
Uh, perhaps First Degree Inconveniencing Our Lightweight Governor's Plans To Run For President? The evidence for the prosecution? Scott Walker is squirting out a big old cloud of ink.
In 2010, he campaigned for governor as a supporter of traditional marriage. He also opposed a law that allowed gay couples to register with counties to get certain benefits, such as hospital visitation rights. "My position has been clear," Walker said Thursday. Indeed, it was. But that is no longer the case. During a 12-minute news conference at a muddy and messy groundbreaking event in Oak Creek, the first-term Republican governor argued that his position on same-sex marriage is no longer relevant. "It really doesn't matter what I think now," Walker said at one point. "It's in the constitution." And it's out of his hands, he suggested. U.S. District Court Judge Barbara Crabb has overturned the state's constitutional amendment, but Attorney General J.B. Van Hollen is appealing that decision. Van Hollen is also raising the possibility of prosecutors charging county clerks who permit gay marriages. "If the people voted to change something in the state's constitution, I think it is right for the state's attorney general to uphold the constitution," Walker said, without explicitly stating whether he agreed with the idea of prosecuting county clerks.
My Lord, our friend Doyle Lonegan is getting a real workout today.